Everything was going fine, until the day she met me..

You ever wonder what kind of impact you and your actions make on people's lives? Now this is not some sappy post about love and feelings and shit but just a general question.I was thinking about that this morning and believe me there is a few things I would change about myself and my actions in the past.

You can tell alot about a person by the way they walk. Are they looking up watching where they are going? Or looking at the ground it says alot about their self esteem. I work downtown and walk from my jeep to work everyday.People watching along the way paying attention to people when they walk... where are they looking? I wonder what is going through there head?

You can also tell if a person is lying when you ask them a question, by the way there eyes move if they look left it is a lie The left side of the brain is the creative side while if they look right there telling the truth the right side of the brain stores all factual information like your hard drive.

I had a dream of growing a mullet getting a convertible piercing my ear and starting a band called "Judy Nails and The grim Reaper" the first single was " it's a midlife crises thing!" man am I baked today............. thinking too much!

Welcome to your Tuesday Gold!

Super Busy at work! It is year end and this post is suffering because the author is actually busy doing his job.........fuckin work

I'm Not myself but somehow I'm still being him

Well If you noticed I tend to slack on doing weekend posts, that's not because I'm lazy but my computer at home is 21 years old and like the girl I met on the weekend, It's tempting to use but not a good idea . So I converted my computer to something more useful..........Hooray for Molson!

Let me tell you a story about Parking tickets

I come to work on Friday with a big box of perogies that people ordered. I park out front carry em in because they are to heavy to carry from the parkade. Believe it or not Friday's are really busy for me, I forgot about my jeep out front and of course I got a ticket witch my co-workers told me about (and I deserve for not putting money in the meter) I go out to investigate around noon and not one but two fuckin tickets on my window. Pissed right off I go looking for the guy to explain I deserve one of the tickets but two? Why be a fuckin dick about it and that's exactly what I told him when I finally seen his dumb ass wandering down the street. He tells me I have to call the parking authority and he can't delete or void the second ticket or talk to me about it so with a few other choice words I told him to "Have a good weekend ya fuckin dickhead" So if you see a bald guy with a stupid grin on his face at the parkade give him the finger for me!

Yes hard to get and even harder to keep...

I stold that subject line from someone who will remain anonymous but in her case it is true.

I called in sick for blogging yesterday apparently you get to be put on some kinda attendance management programme if you miss too many days.

It's been a while since I was your man

I have a slight case of turret's today so random stuff may just appear

I want a job as a mail carrier cause I am bored with my job
~FUCK~

I think my boss got wind of this blog and is now reading it because the last two Thursdays have been busy as hell as compared to the other 50 Thursdays where I did nothing all day.

I think I used to have an email buddy that would help kill some of my workday with random back and forth emails , then she disappeared

I think there is lots of money in the perogie business if you have someone to make em

I may start to drywall the basement this weekend/ next week
~corksoaker~

I love you even when I don't even know I'm doing it

I think poker is the new drug and Socom is in second

I think uncertainty can sometimes be exciting

I think nugatory is a good description of this post

I think doing stuff that you know is wrong still is kinda appealing

I bad hair days are overrated

I think that "success is getting what you want and happiness is wanting what you get"

I think ya'all should buy Tshirts off the link on the side of this blog

I think if you don't have a life talk about mine

I think I have a thing for unobtainable women

I think that the leafs are at the lonely end of the rink

I think the Rangers are going to win the cup this year

I think spell check is great

I'm done thinking for today!

Have a good weekend

My Theory isn't perfect but it's close....

You ever wonder where some people get their drivers licences? Yesterday in effort to keep people happy I went to pick up some perogie orders to deliver. Imagine a little piece of shit ford ranger from the early nineties and an old drooling man behind the wheel . I was behind him for a bit , I move over to the other lane to go by him and the cork soaker speeds up so he's sitting right beside the car in front of me , I go back behind him thinking he's going to carry on accelerating........WRONG ! He drove beside her for 5 minutes till she turned off , side by side like a jackass not letting anyone by and it is clearly obvious I wanted by since I'm tailgating like a bastard. I finally got beside him and gave him a dirty look it did not even phase him, I guess the world is full of dumb drivers they drive around like everyone else and they don't even know their dumb!

On a separate note this is the most retarded website I have seen in 31 years check it out!

Now drive safe ya hear!

Visit the waterkeeper on your way out!

Meet Yer Meat....

I read somewhere that this Wednesday is Steak and Blowjob day. I think they should make that a nationally recognized holiday. Imagine that (well I am ) every calender in Canada marked clearly March 21 ....."First day of spring and Steak and Blowjob day" WOW I would look forward to March every year for three reasons... St patty's day, spring and S+BJ day! For the vegetarians out there you could substitute the steak for tofu, soy or whatever it is you people eat. It would also help cheer some fuckin people up. As you know I work in a large workplace that employs about 480 people some have the winter blues and some no matter what day it is or what the weather is doing their always in a bad mood, grouchy or just plain anal. Maybe this day would help cheer em up!After a while we could just call it SBJ Day for short.

I did the Test the nation IQ test last night and If I did the calculations right my IQ was 96 I had a little help from the man who stopped in for a bit but it was mostly me because I'm awesome! Now I am going shopping for a steak.

Blogging---101---

I have added a page element on the side for those of you who don't want to leave comments. You can email me direct just click the link! I hope all y'all have a good weekend and Happy St Patty's Day!

Super busy at work today........Green beer can make it all better TGIF!

Cheers!

He Who Does You Dirt, Will Do You Dirt Again

During the morning work routine I was listening to this thinking about breakfast as well as doing some work but thinking is as far as I got. I have been on the net all morning. The staff rotation changed and all the people I hung out with to pass the time during my workday are now on nights, so in turn My days are turning out rather boring. I know your thinking why does he not do some work?Well the truth of it is in my awesomeness I finished all my paperwork yesterday , delivery's are slow on Thursdays and I truthfully have nothing to do , you could say your lucky or that's a good job , ya but it does make for long days.
So I watched this little story that happened close to home.With all the bad news out there in the world today , Finally something good ....Also I think they are one natures most efficient hunters and coolest birds. Up there on the list with Eagles and Owls!

Hogan Knows Best......

I did a random interview/questionnaire with "Hogan" to see if he really knows best. These are the answers straight from London Ontario :

1.If you made a life size model of yourself and could put it anywhere where would it go?
As you know this has been done and the life size rendition of myself is currently watching over Horhay in the maintenance shop at the Thunder Bay Casino.

2. If you had a choice........Big Mac or whopper? Prairie dogs or gofers?
Big Mac I am the big mac, I am the big cheese. I guess you could say......I am the Big Mac with Cheese!!!!!
gofers for sure

3.What does Oscar the grouch+a camera+hairgel and a very clean truck equal ?
Andrew Dice Clay

4.most retarded thing you have seen thus far besides hulk hogan?
Party boy drinking horse gizz

5. Whats going through your head right now?
Man I wish I had a Big Mac right now.. I'm stravin!

6.Any ideas on how to get paid for doing nothing?
Easy!! Maintenance supervisor in Thunder Bay

7 If I got people to ask random questions on the blog would you give them advice for free?
Yes because Hogan Knows Best!!

8 what are the chances of 2 palm trees and an LED flashlight ending up in my possession?
Palm trees are slim to none. If I get a bonus I will send the flashlight.

9 Life is full of morons name three...
George Bush, Marvin and Mark Tannahill

10. Do you think Hogan knows best will become the new Ann landers?
No, but you may see Hogan leg drop that bitch!

11.What do you think about this interview/ questionnaire that will be put on the Internet??
I think that this is a worth while endeavour. You should continue to pursue this to the fullest extent.

There it is!! You got questions I may be able to hook you up because Hogan Knows Best!

Random weekend pics....

Notice I caught no fish.......

Gonna pack with the wolves, Better learn how to howl..

As most of you know I was ice fishing all weekend, but I only fished for about 2 hours the rest of the time was spent snowmobiling, eating , drinking and bullshiting. Although the fishing trip was a great success, I am soooooo tired from the fresh air, the beer, and snomobiling. It is about a 2km drive off the main plowed road to get to the camp. We arrive Friday night Paul and his truck towing a trailer with a snomachine and me in the Jeep towing a trailer with a snow machine. Paul asks do you want to drive in on the snow machines, or leave the truck here parked on the main road? I was not to crazy about leaving the jeep there so I asked how far is it 2-3 km I was like I really don't want to leave the jeep here in the middle of nowhere plus we would have to go get the sleigh to pull all the gear in. So we made an executive decision at 10 o'clock at night to drive in with the trucks Paul's leading and it's getting to be alot of snow to drive through 4x4 is howling jeeps sliding around everywhere,were making progress Finally made it to the camp where we were parking unloaded the sleds and gear and whipped em across the lake to my buddy's camp where we were staying. I learned that If you want to pack with the wolves you better learn how to howl !It's time to go cruising to visit people on nearby lakes and ice fishing huts, there was a total of 6 of us howlin till 3am Friday night. Crashed out and was up at about 7:30 to go ice fishing for the day. It is a 20mile ride from camp to the lake we planned to fish, so what's the lesson here? Gonna pack with the wolves better learn how to howl off we go! Got to the lake the boys built a nice fire on shore and we set up for fishing but it was so windy we just huddled around the campfire sheltered on the shoreline from the wind. Made some hot dogs on the fire and decided to move down lake where we could fish and it was sheltered from the wind. Two five plus pound lakers were caught in this spot in 53 feet of water, not by me tho I suck at ice fishing! One guy brought a portable fish finder top check for depth the ice was 3 feet thick and there was 50 ft of water where we were fishing. we fished all day and howled back to camp for supper. I lit the sauna with full intentions to have one but after our moose steak supper with all the fixins I was ready for bed. We venture over to the neighbours for a couple o bubbles I was there till about 10 did i tell you, I'm a candy ass because I went back to camp was crashed out by 11. The next day we as a group(when I say we I mean Paul) were worried about getting stuck with the trucks on the way out. We were up early Sunday, Paul had a theory that the snow would not be as sticky because of the overnight temps and the sun not beating on it all day ... were leaving early bounced our way out with a little difficulty but I made it home by 1pm actually it was noon but the dam time change really started to effect me. I crashed whit ch explains the fact that I never put the pictures from this weekend on my computer... so when I get a chance to post em tonight or tomorrow I will!
Howl out

350 pulls later

Finally got my snowmachine to start ! Bet U can't guess where I went for the weekend.......I will be Back Sunday!

Shit Happens!

There is a urban myth about rainbows there is supposed to be a pot of gold at the end of every one, I say this is as close as your gonna get ever! I do quite a bit of shopping at the Beer store and I think it is safe to say "Shit Happens at the Beer store" let me explain.....
It's dark out, I pull up in the jeep park it and get out, walking towards the door blinded by a cars headlights on the other side of the parking lot, I notice this guy walkin (sort of) towards the door of the store I think wow did that guy drive here......No good that was a cab blinding me anyhow He beats me to the door, enters the store and orders his beer the chick workin was reluctant to serve him but she did and told him "no more tonight" He was like yup and left. OK my turn I smile , order and tell the girl I thought that last guy was driving. She started complaining about the cab company always bringing drunks to the store, so were chatting away Then the fun begins, this guy stumbles up to the counter she or I can't even make out what he was trying to order.I guess he gave up and went outside to send his buddy in. Chatting with the chick at the counter , his buddy stumbles in and stands in front of the wall of beer selections one hand over one eye, reciting out loud what he wanted to order.were kinda laughing as he Wanders up to the counter, were standing there He's just standing there.He says the words "beer" the chick is like your at the right store. I guess he forgot what he wanted in the 20 steps he took to get to the counter so needless to say he was not served and stumbled out.
I was laughing she was laughing .... never a dull moment eh! I grab my beer and left. What I did after that I can't say sometimes shit happens other places then the Beer store!

Bubble up

Survey says.......

So I like Bacon, and so do most people I know. I had a crazy Idea if you were to take the smell of freshly cooked bacon and somehow turn it into aerosol spray for air freshening and counteracting odours around the house. That would be stellar!
You could also trick people in the morning, wake up before everyone else, Spray a little around the house before you know it the people get up. One things for sure they will wake up hungry and you get out of cooking Genius or what? As ya'all can see they do actually make bacon scented air fresheners but do they come in aerosol ?
Not yet!

Load Me Up

Well Hello racefans! I know I have been slacking in the blogging department lately and I actually feel a little guilty when I don't come up with something to post. But really I have not gone out or done much exiting in the last week so what's left? Although Friday was a snow day so I took the day off blogging. I could blog about my couch or the cold weather but who the fuck wants to know about that? So what to write about?... and bam there it was, I'm at work reading the paper and the "top story" was the fact that our slowly dying poor excuse for a city only wants it's residence to put out 2 bags of garbage per household per week. I bet we pay the same amount tax dollars we did when they picked up 3 bags per household now That's fucked! Don't get me wrong I am all for recycling, reducing waste and saving the planet but I don't think that someone will try to fill 3 bags every week I'm just saying if you do end up with lots It is nice to be able to get rid of it. Let's just say it's fall time and you rake up 2 bags of leaves plus you 2 bags of trash = to many bags! It costs a minimum of $5 to go to the city dump and the recycle drop offs are locked tight on the weekends. I think it's safe to say the council that we have voted in is royally screwing up this town Don't even get me started about the skateboard park in the marina.... I think all ya'all should email the city council and tell them something dumb they have done in the last year!!

It should be easy !

Advertising on police cars

To start off the month of March ....I got A new favorite show! I liked it before, but I used to have a dish and I guess I watched other things. Anyhow now that I only have 2 and 4 I look forward to Corner Gas coming on. It is a Canadian produced programme and in my opinion it is truly one of the funniest shows out there.It is on the local channels Monday nights but I Think I'm gonna go buy the previous seasons on DVD tonight!

If you don't like it then my suggestion is........